The round pegs in the square holes

This article is a tribute to Madhuvanthi’s article 

 

There comes a point in life when nothing makes sense. The money you had earned, the fame you had garnered, the people you had entertained, the speeches that you gave and many more things that you did because you had to and not because you wanted to. When nothing makes sense, you want to work for yourself but the world doesn’t allow you to. Still you persist to work for yourself but they will pull you down to their level and beat you with experience. In the circle of life, at every corner you find the one who will pull you back. The urge in you wants to change the world, but doesn’t know how.

Everything has an end to it and so did the stub. 71mm of pure passion lighted by a lesser-realized concept of Physics called friction, dies at the end of a few minutes. The smoke gets in, the smoke gets out and the smoke is all around polluting the atmosphere. Standing on a cliff facing the blanket of blue sea, deciding to jump or not, the liking for the cancer stick gives you an extra five minutes to decide. It’s not as glamorous as the bungee jumping or as crude a definite death. It’s the want to fly. To fly as high as possible when your feet parts the rock and you wish never to touch the earth again. To fly over the oceans and continents and to feel what it feels to carry a weightless body around. To defy Newton in every second of the flight and to realize how free a soul we ought to carry. To see from above and actually realize that it is not that bad a world as we imagine it our minds. I only wish to.

As everybody quotes Apple, I will also take the liberty to quote them.

Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, We see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, Are the ones who do.

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The wish to fly will come true one day. When you land back the world won’t be the same, ever again.

Why Did You Or Why Didn't You?

Yes. After seeing those semi-nude girls dancing in the beach ad, I will buy only Bacardi CD’s. Nothing else. After seeing Haywards Club Soda ad, the first thing that will come to my mind after having a bad stomach is to drink Haywards soda. Khoob jamega rang, jab mil baithenge teen yaar.. aap, mein aur bagpiper club soda. Akshay, I and Bagpiper will sit in a high stooled round-table and will enjoy Bagpiper Club Soda. What a Utopian world! ITC has garment retail in the name of “Wills Lifestyle” and Oh-my-God, we didn’t know till now that they sold cigarettes with the same name. When I was young, I asked why Wills Lifestyle didn’t sue Wills Navy Cut for using their brand. They are spoiling the garment company’s name by linking it to tobacco products. Are you freaking kidding me!!

Surrogate Advertising has really changed the way things work in the world of advertising. But the pinnacle of surrogate advertising has to be given to the brand which runs an airline to promote its beer brands. Slightly out of context, it’s high time the company has to raise its beer prices by a rupee per pint to save the airlines in return. Surrogate advertising is the innovation that was born when “The Cable Television Network (Regulation) Amendment Bill”, came in force September 8, 2000, which completely prohibited cigarette and alcohol advertisement.

Taking specific useless days like Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, Friendship Day, etc. (it’s my opinion because they all are marketing gimmicks. Don’t act as if you don’t respect your dad, mom or friends on any other day except these. When you need money or any help you go to them respectfully!). So, taking these specific useless days into account, a lot of companies make ads to target their customers based on their brands’ relevance to that specific day. Horlicks broadcasts Mother’s Horlicks ads around Mother’s day. Durex uses Father’s day to innovatively promote its brand, addressing their customers saying that “you could have avoided this day :P”. Although Airtel missed out an opportunity with “Tera-Mera” around friendship day, the ad is becoming increasingly irritating (They were good as long as ARR’s tune was playing in the background). But there were other equally irritating ads that come out during friendship day. So, all these companies used these so-called special days to market their brand simply because they are allowed to do so.

But, one such brand needs a special mention here. They are a premium brand and they need advertising because the Indian whiskey market is more than 100 million cases per year and they are a new entrant. The Cable Television Network (Regulation) Amendment Bill doesn’t allow them to advertise directly. Have they missed a huge opportunity to advertise on a day, which was created in Indian parlance and shares their brand name? May be or maybe not. Why didn’t they follow Foster’s “The Art of Chilling” campaign which mocked Sri Sri Ravishankar’s “The Art of Living” programme? Was it a deliberate strategy to miss out on this surrogate advertising opportunity and telling the market and the outsiders that “we are a true and ethical brand and won’t play with the sentiments of the people”? Or was it an honest mistake given their industry’s history of “I don’t give a damn!”

Whatever it is, Happy TEACHER’S Day!

Cheers!!!

Give it to the man!

Everyone was scratching their heads on what business Subrata Roy Sahara did? Whomever I asked told me that they were earlier in Airlines and later into finance. Apart from Sahara-One channel, since time immemorial they are sponsoring the Indian cricket team and now own the IPL team Pune Warriors India and the Pune stadium at Gahunje (30 km from Pune) is named after the Sahara India Pariwar’s honcho. From a marketing point of view, the Indian cricket team jersey is the best place to place your brand for maximum absorption, retention and recall. But when you don’t know what the product/service the brand promoted, the puzzle gets even more complex for the cricket-crazy viewers. Was it soap, a mobile phone or an energy drink or atleast a bank? No one knew. All they knew was that the jersey looks odd without Sahara printed on it. But why such a bizarre marketing campaign to promote nothing at all? All we look for is an ace up the sleeve of Mr. Sahara.

What I wanted to ask him was when he had his own media channel why didn’t he start a sports channel of his own? In February 2012, he strangled the BCCI by saying that Sahara won’t sponsor the Indian cricket team due to some PWI’s auction purse related issue with the board in IPL V. After 12 days tussle, the Indian team sponsorship was revoked and they got what they wanted. Why not use similar strategies and broadcast IPL as well as cricket in general by creating “Sahara Cricket One”? When you can throw money around like that, expertise is never a problem. All one has to create is a culture and make people believe. Mr. Roy has made people believe that there exists a brand called Sahara. And what does it do? No one knows!

I must admit that he is an impressive businessman. No one knew what business Sahara was running, yet they had all the money in the world. Is that not every businessman’s dream? Their recent product that received much attention was OFCDs (Optionally Fully Convertible Debentures). And what is that? Investopedia says that “A Fully Convertible Debenture is a type of debt security where the whole value of the debenture is convertible into equity shares at the issuer's notice. The ratio of conversion is decided by the issuer when the debenture is issued. Upon conversion, the investors enjoy the same status as ordinary shareholders of the company.” Now, what does Optional FCD mean? Give me your money, in return for which I will give you OFCDs. I will use the money as I wish. I will sponsor the Indian cricket team, will buy IPL teams, build financial institutions, buildings, hotels and infrastructure and create media houses for the betterment of the country and its citizens. In return, I will offer you an OFCD by which you may have the option of owning a share of these aforementioned assets at the end of the tenure.

This is a dream come true for any businessman and he almost managed to do it until Securities and Exchange Board of India (SEBI) intervened. Two days ago the Supreme Court upheld the orders passed by SEBI and Securities Appellate Tribunal (SAT) that had directed Sahara’s two firms – Sahara India Real Estate Corp. Ltd. and Sahara Housing Investment Corp. Ltd. to refund the money to the investors that they had raised through OFCDs. And the total money amounts to Rs. 24,029.73 crore. What Sahara did right or wrong is not for me to decide, but what I like here is Subrata Roy’s courage. He is 64 years old and is still young enough to play the game the hard way. He created a pseudo brand Sahara and established it in a big way! But the question still remains in my mind – What does Sahara do?